Getting ready for the State DAR Annual Meeting

First of all, an update for the last blog. Jim has not received Feb. or March Social Security checks as of this date! They have attempted to do direct deposit but Wachovia Bank keeps bouncing the checks back to SS.

Last week the Social Security representative in Andalusia said they would mail paper checks and we should get them in 7-10 days. He suggested we use another bank to see the checks would go to a new account. We also bank at Troy Bank (local) and will try having our checks sent there in April.

Now for the DAR news... I am a member of the John Coffee DAR Chapter and 3 of us "daughters" are going to Auburn on March 11-12 to attend the Alabama DAR annual meeting. Our District is responsible for all the arrangements this year, which includes table arrangements for luncheons and banquet Wed. night. Our chapter will assist with the Regent's Banquet. We will be assisting a chapter in Montgomery. They asked if we would provide 25 "favors" for the officers and guests at the head tables. We will have 9 out-of-state guests at the first tier head table. We tried to come up with something for them to take back home as a remembrance of their trip to the Ala. conference.

One of our members does beautiful china painting and I knew she had been painting little tea bag caddies for her craft show in May at Ole Alabama Town in Montgomery. I thought those would make beautiful gifts for our ladies and asked if she would sell me 25 @$3 each. I picked them up on Friday and have enjoyed looking at them. Here you see a photo of the caddies.

I wrapped the little dishes in tissue paper, included some green tea bags as well as some other assorted tea bags, and then wrapped the package in white toole. Added some shamrock decorations and green ribbons for the bows. I printed out little gift tags with a note about the artist and our club's name. I can't wait for the ladies to unwrap their gifts. I'll take my camera and get  some photos.

Jim is going to the the state meeting with me. He will attend the National Defense luncheon on Wed.with 

me, along with my friend Jane and her husband. He and Jim can keep each other company while we are attending the meetings.

We have 53 members in our DAR chapter, but many live away from this area. It's a shame that only 3 members are attending the state meeting. I go every year and enjoy all the events and seeing old friends.

I usually get an award from the NSDAR Genealogy Preservation Committee for over 100 volunteer hours each year, copying old applications onto the DAR computer website. This year I am a state winner in the American Heritage Division for the rag rug I crocheted. It was entered in the fiber arts category. They sent the application on to the National level. It would be neat to win there.

The conference is being held at the Auburn University Inn and Dixon Conference Center on the Auburn University campus.. We got our reservations in late so we are having to stay 3 miles away from the conference center.

The conference meals are all very expensive, I think. The luncheon is $25 each, the banquet is $39, and breakfast is about $20 I think. I'm only eating the luncheon meal. Wednesday night we plan to go out to eat with Jane and Jess, and get back for the 8 pm general meeting. A reception follows that so it will be a long day. We have to help host the reception and tonight I made cookies to add to the table of goodies. I hope the ladies don't linger at the reception so we can go to our rooms before midnight!

We plan to skip the breakfast event and eat the hotel continental food and go to the closing session at 9 am on Thurs., and vote for new officers, who serve for 3 years. We have to check out by 12 on Thurs. and will start back home after that.

The meeting is always held in March and I like to see what the new fashion is for spring every year. Then I'll go shopping for a new Easter outfit when I get back home.

My sister Christine is a DAR member in Maryland. She joined before I did and I used her papers to join. Apart form the revolutionary ancestor we joined under, we each have 9 other revolutionary ancestors we have researched and they are listed as supplementals on our record. My sister did all of the research and I just tagged along..... Thanks Chris!!

Update on Jim's Social Security Status

We thought Jim's social security check had been reinstated, or at least we were told that it was and that Feb and March checks were being deposited in our bank account last Thursday, Feb. 26.


Well, it didn't happen!! We checked our bank account online several times and when my check was deposited on Tuesday, March 3, we called the local social security office to see what happened.


You can't tall and talk to a person directly. You must leave a message and a day or two later they will call you back. Very frustrating! Tuesday Jim talked to the same person he has been talking to and she was so surprised that the checks had not been deposited and promised to check on it. She called back on Wed. and said the checks were returned by Wachovia bank! So Jim called a friend at Wachovia and he checked with the Direct Deposit people and they said they never received the checks.


So, where do you go from here? He called the lady back at the social security office and left a message yesterday that the checks were never sent to his account, and were not received by Wachovia.


Stay tuned for the next episode. In the meantime we had to take some cash from our savings account and put in our checking account so we could pay bills. Hopefully our main source of income will soon start back.

This all happened when someone made an error at the social security office in reporting our son's death and didn't notice that he and his dad have the same name, James Emory Gilmer, but one is Jr and one is Sr. They didn't use the right social security number. The canceled both checks instead of just one. Jim had to go to the SS office and declare that he was still living and they used photo ID's etc.


Hope you're never reported deceased until you really are!! It's almost as if you aren't around to correct the problem......

Hair styles of the past

You know how one thing reminds you of another. Today I learned that a childhood friend passed away in a nearby town. She was about 4 years older than I but when I was a teen, she seemed so much older! Her family lived near us when we lived in the country. On Saturday, I would wash my hair and walk about 1/2 mile to her house and she would "roll" my hair so I would have curls on Sunday morning when we went to church. My hair was naturally curly and really didn't need any more curls, but I wanted to be in style and have lots and lots of kinky curls. I was a pre-teen and it was so important to be "dressed up", especially on Sunday. I'm shown in this photo with a 1950's hairstyle. I was 17 when this photo was made, in the summer. I rolled my hair on curlers similar to those in the photo below to get this look. I used to cut my own hair back then.


I have thought about these particular curlers many times during my life time and probably not many people ever heard of them. The men of that time smoked Prince Albert tobacco, rolling their own cigarettes (another story someday), and they would give us the empty cans to store things in.


I never liked the smell of the tobacco and would try to rid the odor by putting sweet-smelling things in the can for awhile. We would take a pair of pliars and open the Prince Albert can at the side seam. Then we would use a pair of old scissors and cut narrow strips which we in turned covered with brown paper. Then we would small sections of hair around the curler and bend the ends to the center to keep the curler from falling off or uncurling. Those rollers never wore out. Next is a box containing a permanent wave. I tried one of these once and my fine, curly hair was matted like a cornsilk on the end of an ear of corn. Also shown are some examples of more modern day curlers - in the 60's and 70's.


These days I just wash my hair, several times a week, and let it air dry and it is covered with curls once more. It's so easy to wear this type hair style. I just have to remember to get it cut often.

Jim is no longer in the Social Security System

Our son, James Emory Gilmer, Jr. passed away on Feb. 2, 2009. His death was reported to the Dothan Social Security Office on Feb. 3. James received a payment each month for Social Security Disability and we put it into our bank account and used it for his expenses, etc. He was unable to handle a bank account so I was his payee and handled his money for him.


His check which was deposited in our bank account on Feb. 3rd, 2009, was taken back from our checking account on Feb. 11, 2009. We found out about this when we received a post card in the mail from the Soc. Sec. office on Saturday, Feb. 14th. Jim almost threw the double post card in the trash but opened it up, and read about what they had done.

Now listen to this! They also recalled Jim's social security check and closed out his account, due to death. We went to the Social Security office on Feb. 17 to let them know that he is very much alive. When he called the SS office, they said he must come in in person and bring proof of his "existence". I went along to tell them that he is my husband and that he is indeed James E. Gilmer, Sr. The checks have different numbers so there was no reason to take back both checks.


Jim filled out a lot of forms and the representative told him that she would fax the forms to the Birmingham payment center overnight and on Friday his check should be back in the bank.


Four days later and there has not been a payment sent back to our bank account. Instead, today (Sat.) he received a letter from the Soc. Sec. office telling him that he needs to call them and explain why "he" sent his check back. I also got a letter addressed to me as Payee for James, Jr telling me that I need to return all checks he has received, etc. They took that check out of our account and should not have as it was for January and he died in Feb.


What a mix up!! I guess it happened since they have the same name; one Sr. and one Jr. But with different social security numbers. I wonder if and when Jim will get his account reinstated. This is part of our montly income and we need it.


I guess there will be more trips to the Social Security office and hopefully we will get this resolved in the very near future.


Maybe we should contact President Obama!!!

Buying a Bedspread

In 1979, we built a new house in Winston-Salem, NC. It had 3 levels on the backside, which included a walk-out basement guest bedroom and bath, a first floor and a master bedroom upstairs, on the 3rd level.


We bought new bedroom furniture and chose a poster bed so that you could lie in bed and look out the big windows overlooking the woods behind us to a valley below and I-40 in the far background, and see the beautiful sunrise in the winter. I'm a short person and I thought the bed might be too tall for me and at first I was afraid I would fall off during the night. By today's standards, it is a "low" bed. I would have to have a ladder or stool to climb into the new beds. The top mattress alone would be a good height for me!


Now for the saga of buying a bedspread for our poster bed. Three years ago I bought a white, cotton mattalasse bedspread with shams. Jim disliked the spread from the beginning. Since retiring he helps me make the bed every morning when we get up and was used to a quilted bedspread that had seams for the side of the bed to help you keep the spread straight. He hated the new spread because he could never get it straight. I like the casual look and never noticed that it wasn't perfectly straight along the bottom of the bed. It looked so pretty with our dark cherry poster bed.


So... I started looking for a fitted, quilted bedspread to make him happy. Guess what! They don't make that style anymore. I looked in all the stores in our area and all I could find were heavy comforters and coverlets that are smaller than bedspreads. We live in the South and don't need heavy down comforters to have to remove from the bed every night. Besides they don't tuck down at the bottom of the bed between the tall posts. Comforters were too short to tuck the pillow underneath. When we went to FL in January, my sister and I went to all the stores in Sarasota thinking you could find a lightweight bedspread in that sunny state. Not so!!
Just big fat comforters with lots of pillows (which you also have to remove at night).

When we came back home, I started searching online again. I found a "bedspread" at the JC Penney site, under a "close out" sale page. Originally it was $259 but was on sale for $ 84. I thought $84 was a lot to pay but decided to order it anyway. It came in 2 colors: pink or blue. Ugh.... Jim agreed that the slate blue was a good choice so I ordered the bedspread. I also ordered 2 pillow shams, and 3 waterfall valances for the single window.


The valances and shams arrived right away but the bedspread was out of stock! We waited awhile and the bedspread finally came. To our surprise, there were 2 pillow shams folded inside the bedspread. No mention of this in the description of the ad. I think they must have wanted to get rid of them! Anyway we made the queen size bed, and the bedspread reached the floor on each side with about 4" left over. I will have to cut it off and rehem one side, which I can do. They must have allowed for extra pillows or very fat ones, because I need to cut off about 12" from the length. I plan to use that to make a quilted valance for the window.  First I will look into buying some bed "risers" to put under each post to elevate the bed 3-4" so maybe I don't have to cut off the bedspread.


I forgot to mention that bed coverings are made to fit beds with tall mattresses, which we can't use on our poster bed. We had to get a mattress topper instead. I can still get in the bed without a stool but eventually will need a stool to get out of bed when I get old--er.


Now we're looking at the modern pedestal sinks for our guest bedroom and I haven't convinced Jim that this is what we should buy to replace the old cabinet.

An evening with a great storyteller

She made us laugh, telling tales with her soft, southern voice. It was a cold, rainy night and we could have stayed home and sat in our den, looking over to the corner where the empty recliner would remind us of James' absence.

Instead we accepted 2 free tickets to go to the Just Folk coffeehouse on the town square in our little town of Elba to hear a great story teller, Kathryn Tucker Windham.  The petite, 90-year-old lady had come from Selma, a 2-hour drive away, to share recollections of her southern life. :

The coffeehouse was packed and many of us sat in straight-back chairs (some had cushions) or if you got there early, you chose one of the big soft chairs or sit on a sofa. Refreshments were laid out on the kitchen counter at the back of the long room and the aroma of fresh coffee greeted us as we walked into the big room (once a theater).

I was amazed that she stood on the small stage (right in front of us) for 2 hours, except for a 15 minute break. She spoke into a microphone which was nice since she has a soft voice. I was amazed that she could step up onto the stage.

You get so immersed in her dialogue that you forget about anything else. Jim and I laughed and laughed and it felt so good following the sadness after our son's death on Feb. 2nd.

A great lady, and a great evening. So many memories of my own childhood. She's only 16 years ahead of my time. And we share so many of the same experiences and philosophies. She's a much better story teller! You can listen to her talking on NPR and Ala Public Radio, but it just isn't the same as looking into her eyes and see her smile as she looks right at you while she's speaking.

Floral tributes & Memorials for James' funeral

Shown here are some of the flowers we received for our son James' funeral on Feb. 5, 2009. Only a few fresh flowers were taken to the cemetery and they froze overnight, it was so cold that day.

We have a lot of pot plants in our living room and I am wondering what I will do with them. I'll find places for them next week (Jim calls me "Scarlett" because my motto is "I'll think about that tomorrow"). Flowers are so comforting and I love them.

Many people have made contributions to our church in memory of James. Often I would have to leave during the sermon to take him to the bathroom (he didn't have a colon and his food had no place to stop after he digested it, and if I heard his stomach rumbling or growling, I knew there wasn't much time left to get to the bathroom). At our church, the bathrooms are behind the pulpit area so we would go to the back of the church, go outside, around the building and come in at the back to get to the bathroom.

Our new pastor, Stanley Carter, was aware of this problem and he and some others talked about putting a bathroom at the back of the sanctuary but there was not a good place. So... this evolved into a big capital fund project (over $650,000) and we are in the 3rd year of our 6 year goal. So I guess we have James to thank?? for this big project. Maybe we'll put a sign on the bathroom wall, "In memory of James Gilmer"! I wonder if anybody every had a bathroom dedicated to them???

Others sent donations to the Coffee Co. Training Center that James attended M-F all year long.

He didn't like the heat and there is not much shade outside the building, so I had been talking to the Director about the parents getting a large pavilion for them to have picnics, etc. I'm hoping we can do this with donations made to the center.