And now about Jim's step mother, Mary Logan Gilmer. She passed away early Sunday morning, Sept. 21 in Kannapolis, NC. She never recovered from the stroke she had on 9/11/08. That date will take on more meaning of what happened on the other 9/11.
Jim was already in Harrisburg, NC (Cabarrus County) when she died. Our son Ron drove to Elba from Austin, TX and arrived on Sun. around noon, soon after we got the news of grandmother's death. There was a fear of not being able to find gasoline on the long drive but he made it ok. We couldn't leave to go to NC until Tuesday morning as I had a lot of heart tests scheduled for Monday. We left early on Tues., riding to Harrisburg in Ron's big diesel pick up truck for 10 hours. We met other relatives upon arrival and rested for the funeral the next day.
The funeral took place on Wed., Sept 24, at 4 pm at Harrisburg Presbyterian Church where she was a member for 61 years. Let me go back to Wed. morning when the family all gathered at the funeral home for a private viewing at 11 a.m. She requested in her funeral arrangements that she left behind that only the family see her. Our 3 sons were there and 3 of the 5 granddaughters came. Mary's sister, 2 brothers, and nieces and nephews from KY were there, along with Jim's brother Larry and his wife.
From there we went to the church for lunch prepared by the ladies of the church, Mary's friends. At 2:30 pm we gathered at the church Fellowship Hall for a 3-3:45 visitation prior to the funeral. Jim left Harrisburg after high school in 1952 and only returned for short family visits, so he lost touch with people he had known. He did get to see one of his classmates and even one of his teachers. It was so touching to talk to many of the older people about how they were his mother's "best friends". She was a great volunteer and worked almost every day helping serve lunches to two senior centers.
We went into the church sanctuary at 3:45 pm. The afternoon light was shining on the beautiful dark wood casket with the flowers the family chose to put on the casket. Mary had requested no flowers but a few were placed there. I think the most important part of the sermon was when Jim walked to the pulpit and did a eulogy of his mother (step-mother). He talked about her life and the hard times growing up in KY during the depression, and how she worked hard to get her education. She taught school for many years and some of her elementary school students came to say good-bye to one of their favorite teachers. That was so touching.
A couple of weeks before her death, she mailed her son Larry a copy of her funeral plans. We tried to follow them as she requested, except for the fact that we placed some flowers on top of the casket to ease the burden of staring at the big dark casket.
We went down the street to the church cemetery in the middle of the town of Harrisburg, and she was buried beside her husband J.T., Jim's father. It was a beautiful day and a nice breeze blowing.
Friends came to say good bye and we (the family) all went back to her house. Most people went back home but some of us stayed until the next day (Thurs). Before we left to go back home, Larry asked if we all wanted something to remember her by. She used to paint and several people chose a painting. Our son James wanted a clown picture she had painted and now he has it in his bedroom.
It's still hard to imagine her not being there when we go back to NC to see all our relatives scattered over the state. Soon the house will be sold and there won't be a "home" to go back to.
Someday I will ask Jim for permission to print the eulogy he wrote. It was so touching and everything he said had special memories for her family and close friends.
So long Mary...... rest in peace!
