Wednesday, August 15, 2007

My Mother


       This is one of just a few photos I have of my mother, Ruth Smith Wilson (made in 1960 at age 45). She  died suddenly from a blood clot at age 48 on Sunday afternoon, April 28, 1963 - the same month that two of her grandchildren (Bradley and Cyndi) were born. She wrote me a letter the week before telling us all about grandchildren #5 and #6. I got the letter after returning home to Bremen, GA the next week. I had great difficulty opening the letter and reading it. (I still have that letter.)
      We were living Bremen, GA when she died and Jim worked for Cluett Peabody who made Arrow shirts. He was on a trip to Washington, DC and New York with the Jaycee's from GA. We had to locate him and my brother in law Al whom Jim had visited in Washington, DC, called Grand Central Station downtown DC where they had dropped Jim off to catch the train and they got a message to him just before they boarded the train to NY. Can you imagine your name being called over the loud speaker in the big train station? He said he knew something was wrong.
     Our minister and his wife drove to the Atlanta airport to pick him up late at night and the next day we drove to Elba. I remember the shock and the sad trip. Our children were young: 5,7, and 8. Other sisters and their families were arriving from different states. My sister Christine couldn't come since her baby Cyndi was just born.
      My dad wanted mother's body brought to the house for the wake (like they used to do long ago) instead of leaving her at the funeral home. I guess the shock of her sudden death made him want to have her close by. I just remember people sitting up all night in the living room where her casket was placed, and how difficult it was to sleep in the bedroom next to the living room wall.

     My 3 younger sisters were still living at home. Judy was a senior in high school, Alice was a Jr. and Carolyn was in the 6th grade and only 12. I don't remember too much about the funeral except there were so many people there. They even closed the school in Elba the day of her funeral and I didn't ever remember them doing that. We met so many people who knew her from working with her at Covington Industries where she went to work on her first job, as an inspector in 1952, when I started to college. So many recounted the kind things she had done for them and how nice she was to everybody. That was my mother!
      When we were young she made all of our clothes, gathered food all summer to can and preserve, worked in the garden and field, cooked meals in the early days on a wood stove, and helped all the neighbors with their chores. Wash day was a big event every week with all of us chipping in to help. I loved building fires under the big black wash pot. Even today I love to build fires and am very good at it. She taught us to iron the stiffly starched garments and not to scorch them or create wrinkles or creases. To this day I like to iron and removed all the wrinkles.
     My mother would remind us to complete our homework (but never had time to help us) and encouraged us to make good grades so we could get a scholarship to go to college and leave the farm. She was valedictorian of her class at Elba High School in 1932 but the depression was going on and she couldn't go to college. She wanted to make sure we did. All 6 daughters have college degrees, plus one has her doctorate and two have Master's degrees. Our brother Perry attended the Univ. of Ala. and had so many college classes later at work that he probably had enough hours for a PhD.
     I recently read in an old Elba Clipper, on the front page, that Ruth Smith, a popular young lady, had married Lawrence Wilson, a farmer from the Curtis community. They moved in with his parents and we lived with them until I was in the 6th grade. Ah, such happy memories living there with them. Another story, another time. This was during and right after WWII.
      I remember the first visit back "home" after my mother died, how hard it was to get out of the car and go inside. She wouldn't be there to greet us and hug and kiss the grandchildren. In time, my father learned to locate his clothes, to buy groceries and do a little cooking, and after a few years remarried when his youngest daughter was in high school.
      I have a hard time remembering what my mother looked like since I got married at age 19 and lived too far away to visit but once or twice a year. But her kindness and all the things she taught us has remained a big part of my life. When I accomplish something in my life for which I am proud, I always look up and thank my mother, and I can just see her smiling down on me!

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

My High School Graduation

Elba High School where I graduated in 1952

It was an exciting day in Elba, AL on May 17, 1952 when we assembled for graduation, all 61 of us; 30 girls and 31 boys.

Imagine packing that many students on a small stage, all wearing cotton caps and gowns and many of the girls wearing white, cotton dresses and high heels under the gowns. We marched into the auditorium to the strains of Pomp and Circumstance. There was no air conditioning then and the big windows were raised. The fog from the river bottom crept into the auditorium, along with flying insects.

The honor students were selected and the top three students all came from the Curtis Consolidated School 8 miles out in the country; and I was one of them. The other two were Annette Taylor and Floyd Griffin. We attended school together for all 12 years. When we graduated from Curtis in the 9th grade, we started to school in Elba for the next 3 years. We got a good basic education at the country school.

The day before graduation, I had a sore throat and my eyes were burning. I went to see Dr. Kimmey and he gave me a shot of penicillin (a cure-all back then) and said I would be better the next day. Graduation morning I got up and went to school but didn't feel too good. I had a terrible headache and my eyes were burning.

I had to make a speech and although I had memorized it, I had notes in case I faltered. When I got up to make my speech, I was very light-headed and vision was so blurred I couldn't read my notes. I remember it was dark out in the auditorium and that helped the situation. I got through the speech and sat down. Immediately I began itching all over with a rash. It was so hot on the stage and I thought I was going to pass out. Graduation was finally over and we marched back through the auditorium to the hallway.

I was invited to a graduation party and had brought clothes to change into but all I wanted to do was to go home and cool off. I located my parents and my mother said that I had little red bumps all over my face and arms. Guess what! I came down with the big red measles the night I graduated.

Recently I was reading old Elba Clippers on microfilm at the Elba Library and I found an article about our graduation and it mentioned that a large number of students in all the grades had had the measles the last few days of school - and I was one of them!

We had our 55th class reunion this year and sadly, many of the 61 are no longer with us. We are all in our 70's now and many have health problems. But when we get together it's as if we were back in school and we re-live those days and have fun recalling them. We agreed to start getting together once a year now.

By the way, the year I graduated our football team won almost every game (tied one).

Monday, August 13, 2007

I Believe In Santa, Don't You?


James Gilmer visiting Santa



Santa will always be coming to our house and we must remember to leave cookies and milk for him. Our adult son James looks forward to Christmas with great anticipation. We insist he wait until the day after Thanksgiving to start playing Christmas music and practicing his near perfect Ho-Ho-Ho’s. This is also when he starts wearing his collection of Santa sweatshirts, and Christmas ties every Sunday.

James was born on Dec. 8, 1956 and we realized very early that he was not normal. He didn’t walk until he was 4 years old and speech came slowly for him. His older and younger brothers were kind to him and helped him during his early years. Things he said and did when he was young were funny, but as he grew older, they took on a different meaning and sometimes not so amusing.

Apart from his size, there aren’t many ways that he functions as an adult. He reasons with the capabilities of a six-year-old, but communicates and has social skills of an adult. When we realized that he had absorbed all of the education skills that he could attain, we started emphasizing social skills and teaching him “survival” skills. His memory is terrific – a living appointment book for us. He never forgets dental appointments, special events, etc. Also he never forgets names of people which is a great bonus for his dad and me!

Back to Santa Claus… We have given up trying to convince him that he’s too old for Santa. Even made him a Santa suit one year and when he put it on and looked at himself in the mirror, he took the suit off and never put it on again. It frightened him. So, we just gave up and let him believe in Santa. He goes about singing carols (his favorite is Jingle Bells) and playing his Christmas records.

Life is simple and uncomplicated for James. He is so trusting and loves everybody – almost. There are a few people he rejects - those who treat him different and talk down to him. He wants to be just like everybody else. As Christmas draws near, his anticipation is so great he can hardly sleep and is up before daylight every day, often checking to make sure there is space under the Christmas tree for Santa to leave his gifts.

James believes that you should always apologize when you are wrong, never wants anybody to argue, and if you promise him something, he never forgets that promise. He is always sincere. James has always gone to church and a few years ago, wanted to join the church. Our Presbyterian minister questioned him about his sincerity and belief in God The minister came away with tears in his eyes and said he had no doubt about James’ simple faith and he was accepted as a member of the church.

When you ask James if he knows the true meaning of Christmas, he can relate the entire story about the birth of Jesus. He doesn’t like the Easter story, especially when Jesus was crucified. His limited reasoning cannot handle that wrongdoing. James truly believes in Peace on Earth, Good Will to Men!

Life isn’t easy living with a mentally handicapped son but we have been so blessed by his presence in our family (and often embarrassed). He has endured a lot of physical pain in his 50 years, but his limited knowledge of his problems helps him move on to better things. He treats everybody equal and is comforted by having his friends around.

James rides a van to Enterprise every day, 20 miles from home, to attend the Coffee Training Center. This is his life and where his friends are. He enjoys bowling with his friends 2 times a month. They have parties and dances and field trips at work.

If he had enough money, he would buy a present for everybody in the world! He enjoys putting money in the Salvation Army kettles and donating to charities. He doesn’t ask for much for himself but loves to help shop for presents to wrap for his 5 nieces and 2 brothers.

His hobbies are watching the Atlanta Braves ball games, collecting baseball cards, and trains.
At the present time he is battling kidney failure and the prospect of having to go on kidney dialysis is looming in the future. Right now his kidney's are operating at 20%. It's becoming more difficult to travel for long distances. But that doesn' bother James. He's seen a large part of the US and has been to England. He's content to stay at home and watch the travel channel.

Sunday, August 12, 2007

How my Graduation Gift turned into a visit to Harrods in London




My dad, Lawrence Wilson, traveled all the way from Elba, AL to Paris, TX to attend my  graduation from East Texas State University in May 1976 (now Texas AandM at Commerce).


In the next photo, I'm getting pinned with my "Honors" cord. I entered the school's honors program and graduated magna cum laude. My thesis was "A 2,000 year Circle in the Use and Concepts of Ladies Undergarments". A copy is in the school library and when our younger son Bill was at ETSU, he discovered my name in the card catalog and called me in Minneapolis to ask if I knew about that!                                
I started to Troy State in Sept. 1952 

and met Jim in the summer of 1953. He was in the army and stationed at Ft Rucker. We got married in Oct 1953 and in Jan. he was sent to Germany and I dropped out of school at the end of the winter quarter and went with him. During the ensuing years I would take college classes at various places we lived and in 1973 I entered Paris Jr. College to take some art courses. I only needed a few basic couses to get my Associate Degree so I did that in the spring of 1974.





My art teacher encouraged me to go to East Texas State Univ. in Commerce, Tx (40 miles away) and get my B.S. degree which I did in   May 1976. Jim was working at Vassarette, ladies division of   Munsingwear, and I was very interested in the history of ladies undergarments and chose this topic for my honor's thesis. I enjoyed my historic costume classes so much that I asked Jim if I could travel to London to visit the Albert and Victoria Museum when I graduated and he agreed that would be a great trip for graduation. Six years passed before I went to London.


Soon after I graduated, Jim was transferred to Minneapolis where we lived 2 winters and decided to move back south, this time to Winston-Salem, NC. Soon after moving to NC, I signed up to go on an exchange trip with FriendshipForce and we went to Peine, Germany for 2 weeks.
You lived with a host family one week and then could travel other places the 2nd week. Finally I was going to go to Albert and Victoria Museum in London. I arrived in London by train and found a place to stay near Victoria Station. The next morning I got up very early and got the tube (subway) to the museum.

When I arrived at the museum that morning, I went to the building housing the historical clothing, etc. and a sign on the door which said: "Closed for renovation until further notice". I could not believe what I was reading. I sat down on the steps and cried.  I remembered passing Harrod's Dept store on the way to the museum so to ease my grief, I decided to spend the day browsing around Harrod's.

Then I left there and visited the National Gallery of Art. The next day was Saturday and I did the tourist stuff in London, i.e., Buckingham Palace to see the changing of the guards, a double decker bus tour of downtown, and the Royal Gardens. That night I went to see "Best Little Whore House in Texas" at the Royal Theater, along with a friend of our son Bill who was living in London. She met me for dinner and then we went to the theater.

When I got up Sunday morning, it was very cold (April) and it was Easter Sunday. I didn't have many clothes in my carry on bag, so I put on everything I had in the bag to keep warm. I was wearing open sandals so I wore 2 or 3 pair of stockings. I went to Easter service at Westminister Cathedral and was allowed to sit near the front of the church since I arrived early. It was so warm inside, I stayed for 2 services and to hear the beautiful music again!

On Monday, I read the newspaper headlines that the airlines were on strike and trains were about to stop running. I cashed in my airline ticket for a train ticket and headed back to Peine, Germany - located between Hamburg and the East German border to meet up with my group to get on a bus to go back through East Germany to Berlin where we would fly back to the US.
I arrived back in Peine at 2 a.m. and got a taxi back to the family's home where I was staying.
My trip from London, thru Belgium, France and back to northern Germany was an experience I'll never forget. I'll save this for another blog. I thought that if I ever got back to NC, I would remain there forever.... but I didn't.

Years later when I was visiting my sister Carolyn when they were living in Ascot, near London, she asked if I wanted to go to the Albert and Victoria museum and I had lost all interest. For 3 weeks she took James (our mentally handicapped son) and me all over England on day trips. James and I took the train to the Cotswold mountains one Sunday to visit my daughter-in-law's parents who were retired and living in Stroud near the Wales border.

Moral of this story is to call ahead when you are going to see something special (even in a foreign country) to make sure they are open! For example, Jim went to the Louvre when in Paris, France, attending a meeting in the early 1970's and the museum was closed because the workers were on strike!!

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Reunions - I love them!

Front row, L to R: James Shorter Grimes, Clem, Spurgeon, Morgan and Malissia Tillis Grimes. 2nd row: Mary Blankenship, Eugene, Cynthia Meacham. 3rd row: Surley, Fannie Wilson, Toby, John, Julia Smith, Buddy Grimes and Lillian Redmond.


James Shorter and Malissia Tillis Grimes and 13 of their 14 children gather for a family portrait. Ellie, the youngest, was not born when this photo was made. My grandmother Fannie is 2nd from left on back row.



I have such fond memories of going to the Grimes family reunion. Always on the lst Sunday of October we would gather under the big oak trees at my Grandmother Malissia Grimes' home in the country at Curtis, near New Ebenezer Baptist Church, to celebrate her birthday. She had 14 children and most of them lived close enough to make the trip in one day. We lived with my grandparents until I was in the 6th grade and I remember that my mother and grandmother would cook and bake all week, getting ready to go to the 
reunion. My favorite foods at the reunion were banana pudding, banana sandwiches and grandmother's tea cakes or homemade fig newtons. The men would stretch a long roll of fencing between the trees to form a table for the food. The fencing was covered with white starched and ironed tablecloths that smelled so fresh when they spread them out. Then the food would be placed along the "tables" and you can imagine the aromas when lids were removed from pots and bowls.


The "cousins" had fun exploring and playing under the scuppernong vine, finding a few scattered scuppernongs to eat. Or taking a walk to the big woods nearby looking for grandmother's turkeys that stayed in the woods. Most of all we spent time getting acquainted since we all attended different schools around. After WWII ended, families moved away, and interest in the family reunion waned for several years. Grandmother Grimes died when I was a senior in high school in 1952, in her 90's. I went away to college and forgot all about the reunion. Football games were more important. After a period of not having reunions, my Aunt Mattie Lena, invited the "first cousins" to her house for a cousins reunion sometime in the 1970's I think. And the reunion has continued since that date. Now it's a 2nd cousins and other kin who make up the reunion crowd.

Each year someone from one of the 14 families is responsible for the reunion. This year it is the family of John and Mae Grimes, and their daughters Hazel Lee and Eva Deal. They send out cards to remind people, put notices in the papers, get supplies together, etc. and then there's clean-up and disposal of trash afterwards. Nobody looks forward to being host/hostess but then that family usually has more attending and to help out and they have fun getting together.


The reunion is held at New Ebenezer Baptist Church under the covered pavilion that the Curtis School alumni built a few years ago for their reunions. My grandfather James Shorter Grimes was the first person buried in the cemetery there. He died at a young age with typhoid fever, before their 14th child was born. The front part of the cemetery is filled with Grimes families since many of the 14 children are buried there, along with their families. We have our plot reserved, next to my parents Lawrence and Ruth Smith Wilson.


The next time you are invited to a reunion, whether its family, school, work, etc. don't hesitate for a minute to go. You'll have so much fun "remembering" and if it's a school reunion, you'll be amazed at how your classmates have aged!

Friday, August 10, 2007

Railroad Trestle across Pea River at Elba, AL


This photo was taken March 2005 when my brother Perry Wilson took me on a boat ride down the Pea River to the dam. I was so surprised to see the trestle still standing. The train stopped coming to Elba many years ago and the track was taken up.

When I was a little girl in the 1940's, I would visit my Mama and Papa Smith in Elba and accompany my aunts and their friends when they walked on the railroad track and crossed the river on the trestle. Trains did not come to Elba on week-ends so it was safe. I could never get very far and would sit and cry until they would help me back to the bank of the river. I was ok until I looked down and saw the water and then I panicked. I still don't like heights and stay off ladders!

The railroad crossed the river near my Uncle Drayden Smith's store, Smith Bros. and the depot was in front of his store in New Town. The train workers would always have some good roasted peanuts from Sessions where they last stopped and would share them with us. Elba was the end of the line and the train would deliver freight. I remember the big packages the workers would unload onto to the platform of the depot. People would have to come pick them up. Soon after we moved to Elba in the winter of 2003, I wanted to walk behind Smith Bros old store and see if I could find the trestle. The track had been removed but I thought I could see an outline of the trestle through all the brush. I was so happy to find that it was still there when we traveled down the river that cold March day.

The scenery along the way to the dam is so nice. At one point there is a beautiful sandy bank and we saw some houses along the way, with steps going down to the water. I wonder who lives in these houses? Maybe they are week-end retreats.

It's so much fun to return to a place in your past and find it is still there after about 60 years. The Pea River is an asset for the city of Elba, waiting to be used as a tourist attraction someday. I know people would love to take boat rides and watch the wildlife along the way.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Living In the frozen north - Minneapolis


When I heard about the bridge collapsing in Minneapolis, my thoughts were about how many times we have crossed that bridge and enjoyed the riverview and St. Anthony's Falls upstream. You crossed the Miss. River on this bridge to get to the twin city of St. Paul, the capital of MN.
This is our home, on a hill, in Wayzata, MN, about 12 miles west from downtown where Jim worked (Vice Pres. of Manufacturing, Vassarette Women's Div) at the Munsingwear Headquarters. We transferred from Texas in May and everything was green and lilacs were blooming and it was beautiful. We didn't know we would be going up this hill in several feet of snow in the winter! I had a neighbor with a snow plow (he was a contractor) and he found out I could sew and repair his Eddie Bauer down jackets, so we bartered right away. He plowed our driveway when it snowed and I mended his jackets when he snagged them while working. Our home was split level with a basement where we would stay in the summer when it was hot on occasions. We didn't have air cond. I really enjoyed living near Lake Minnetonka and we learned to go cross country skiing on Cargill Grain corporate headquarters property adjoining our property nearby or on golf courses.
Our mentally handicapped son James was still attending public school in Crystal, several miles away. The roads were plowed during the night and his school bus (van) was never late and never missed a day because of weather. Jim was traveling to plants in Texas and AR and LA, so he was gone a lot and hated to return to the cold weather. He was happy when he was offered a job with Bali, Div. of Hanes, in Winston Salem and we moved there after two winters in MN. I attended VP Hubert Humprey's funeral while living there. We had met him earlier at the sheltered workshop his granddaughter attended. The quality of life in Minneapolis was great! And I loved the summers there - so many blue lakes all over the city. The winters were another story. We left two sons in Texas, in college, when we moved and later the youngest son, Bill, got a job in St Paul with KSTP TV station for awhile. I still have two friends there that I hear from on special occasions.